GREEN BUDS AND HASH (A Pot Poem)
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GREEN BUDS AND HASH
A pot poem by Dana Larsen
Would you like green buds and hash?
- No I would not, Mister Stash!
Would you like them in a bong?
Would you like them all day long?
- No I would not in a bong!
- No I would not all day long!
- I do not like green buds and hash.
- I do not want them Mister Stash!
Would you like them wrapped in paper?
Will you try them now or later?
- I do not want them wrapped in paper.
- I don't want them now or later.
- I don't want them in a bong,
- I do not want them all day long.
- I do not like green buds and hash,
- I do not want them Mister Stash!
Would you like them in a joint?
- No I would not, what's the point?
Perhaps you would prefer a puff?
Just have one, that is enough.
- I won't partake, not of a puff,
- Nor a hoot, nor hit, nor huff!
Would you try a tiny toke?
- No I don't want any smoke!
What if they were vaporized?
- I've told you no a thousand times!
Would you, could you, in a cake?
Or in cookies I can bake?
- I do not want them in a cake,
- Or in cookies you could bake.
- I do not want them vaporized,
- Or other means you have devised.
- I do not wish to try a toke,
- Or otherwise inhale smoke.
- I won't participate in puffs,
- You have asked me quite enough!
- I get no joy from juicy joints,
- I really do not see the point.
- I do not want to use the bong,
- I think that buds and hash are wrong.
In a tincture would you take it?
I could show you how to make it.
- I do not want them in a tincture
- Or in any other mixture!
- I do not want green buds and hash,
- I do not want them Mister Stash!
- Why do you care if I try them?
- Will you profit if I buy them?
I offer buds and hash for free,
There is no benefit to me.
Someone said that that you were sick,
green buds and hash might do the trick.
If you find you're getting thinner,
With no appetite for dinner,
Or you suffer from sclerosis,
Epilepsy or neuroses,
For almost all the ills that ail ya,
buds and hash will never fail ya.
Have glaucoma? PMS?
Green buds and hash have much success.
For protection against strokes,
Its best to have some potent tokes.
If your muscles are not dandy,
Try some green bud infused candy.
For migraines, spasms, even cancer,
Green buds and hash provide the answer.
If you are not feeling right,
Then have green buds and hash tonight.
- It's true I am not feeling great,
- My health's been rather poor of late.
- My doctor says that I have ills,
- He told me I should take these pills.
- I cannot even sleep at night,
- I never do feel quite alright.
- I will try green buds and hash,
- I will try them Mister Stash!
Pfffffffffffffft!
- Hey now I am feeling good!
- They worked just like you said they would.
- I have never felt this fine!
- Green buds and hash are quite divine!
- I will bake a green bud brownie,
- Whenever I am feeling frowny.
- I will try them vaporized,
- That technique seems very wise.
- I will take them in a tincture,
- And in every other mixture.
- Perhaps I would prefer to puff,
- And stop when I have had enough.
- I will roll some massive joints,
- And smoke them down to little points.
- I will toke upon the bong,
- I will do it all day long.
- I really like green buds and hash,
- I do enjoy them Mister Stash!
- Thanks for being so insistent
- And for being so persistent.
- My mind and body are improved,
- My spirit also has been moved.
- Though I was told they are a sin,
- Green buds and hash are medicine.
- I'm sorry that I was so hateful,
- Now I know I should be grateful!
- Thank you, thank you, Mister Stash,
- Thank you for green buds and hash!
LMAOROF Great Dana keep up the superb writing.
__________________________________________________________________________ I was Going to Not Have a Tagline but Since M.Spector likes them so Much I decided to Keep It Just To Please Him.
Thanks guys. I appreciate your comments.
I have been writing some "Weedster Fairy Tales" recently, I might post some of them here too...
Eight years later and this poem is available in book form, along with some wonderfully Seussian illustrations.
Get your copy or just check it out at http://greenbudsandhash.com
Here's something strange. I think this thread is the all-time most viewed thread on Rabble!
With 57,809 views, it has more than five times the views of any other thread I could find.
I'm not sure how that happened. Does this qualify me for some sort of prize?
Great to see you back here, Dana, and congrats on your latest publishing venture!
Sounds like fun!
Dana, my subjective feeling is that the most viewed thread on babble was the one where I accidentally banned myself while doing a moderating gig. However, you're probably right. The thread does indeed deserve a prize. If you're ever in Toronto, email me and I'll give you a nice fat doobie. That will have to do in lieu of the Booker prize you so richly deserve but probably won't get.
Nice to see you around again.
In the spirit of Theodore Seuss Geisel ...