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Damn, will the persecution of culinary hipsters never end? Oh the humanity.
(You had me until you included the word "cool" in the thread heading)
Way less awesome?
Should I have put this in babblers helping babblers? Are you all heartless fiends?
Around the corner from my place there was a store with a sign on the front that said "BEEF & PORK JERKY". Which is exactly what they sold. You walked in, and a gruff woman at the counter took your order. There was an 8.5" x 11" paper taped to the side of an empty counter fridge which listed the prices, starting at 1/2 pound and going up to 100 lbs. For those who have never tasted Singapore jerky, I have only this to say: IT IS THE BEST.
A few months back, beside the price sheet, there was suddenly another 8.5" x 11" sheet stuck on the side of the empty fridge (which occasionally also had pork seaweed in it). It advised me to "Be sure to tune in to Dragons Den on such-and-such a date for exciting BKH news." I didn't know then, but BKH turned out to be the name of the business (which as far as I knew was "BEEF & PORK JERKY").
So I did, and I saw the two dudes who are usually grilling up the jerky panhandling before Canada's greatest monster (O'Leary) and his cronies, who were chewing on my favourite Singapore jerky with gusto. The Boston Pizza crony offered them a lot of money, which they duly accepted. Hooray, I tepidly thought.
A month or two after that, I went to my favourite Singapore Jerky joint to find chains on the door and a sign (still modest A4 stuff) telling me that this location was PERMANENTLY closed, and that a new store would be opening about a dozen blocks to the south. Not too bad, but alarming, I'm not going to lie.
The new place was shiny. It had customer service and cheerful staff. Worst of all, it had a new sign which said "BKH" on it in a new logo and fancy lettering. The jerky also had the new brand and logo on it (it used to just be a clear plastic bag, vaccuum sealed if you wanted). The vaccuum sealer (which also looked new) had been moved out front so that sealing your jerky could be part of the customer experience. They also seemed to sell other stuff, but I was too distraught to see what.
Jerky's still pretty good, though.
babble community, please advise.
On the odd chance you haven't already been convinced I am a heartless bastard...
What's the problem? Has the recipe changed? Are these newly cheerful staff indentured servants? Has the gruff woman been detained without cause? Are your investments totally tied into A4 paper and you are facing financial ruin because of their shift to more commercial signage? Is there some big mean dog that is threatening you on the only possible route to the new location?
Bagkitty's well considered advice on maintaining awesome coolness:
1) Go the university radio station DJ route and declare that Singapore jerky is "so last week" and have nothing more to do with it.
2) Go totally retro and replace the jerky with Spork on a toothpick. Bad taste retro is always awesome.
Or, to mangle the single best line from my latest guilty pleasure (The Avengers movie) "PUNY
GODPROBLEM"Isn't jerky full of nitrates and stuff?
At first glance, none of this seems to be the case, but with such a massive sea change, there is JUST NO WAY TO KNOW FOR SURE.
Um, I completed step one the first time I tasted the jerky and I've been doing step two since my demo tape.
You're full of nitrates, man.
Careful there Boom Boom, the U.S. department of Homeland Security may view you as a threat. Being "full of nitrates" you would be an explosives hazard, and your chosen handle does nothing to calm their paranoia.
Dragons Den: a blight on our times.
Kevin O'Leary: a blight on our times.
As something to emulate, and as entertainment I agree.
On the other hand, as something from which to learn some cold, hard lessons that most of us don't want to look at, it is a great resource.
It's not something I have ever watched regularly, but I did happen to cath the episode in which Brett Wilson, the guy fron Saskatchewan who isn't there anymore, told a contestant that she should not take any of their money, and continue to do what she was doing.
Sorry man, but business, like household finances, runs on money. If I could ignore that fact I would have an extra $3,000 I earned in pocket, rather than having to pay it out for financing. And I am not in the position of hitting a wall because I don't have the cash to do something.
That's why people wind up on television doing the monkey dance.
Creemore sucks. If you want a good, independent, non-corporate craft beer, there's no shortage from which to choose.
Mill Street (Toronto), Duggan's (Toronto), Cameron's (Toronto), Flying Monkeys (Barrie), Muskoka (Muskoka), Tree Brewing Co. (Kelowna), Nickel Brook (Burlington), Amsterdam (Toronto) plus tons of even smaller ones across Canada and a massive number of amazing American craft beers. There's no reason to settle for fizzy, watery, yellow swill.
Hee. Mr. Tea, you are lecturing the wrong person on craft beer! I actually make beer that rivals 90% of Canadian microbreweries. You are, I think, mistaking Creemore Springs for Sleeman's Cream Ale/Silver Springs Lager (which also earns my ire for purchasing Unibroue a few years ago before being in turn purchased by Sapporo), both of which are "fizzy, watery, yellow swill."
Before Molson purchased Creemore Springs, it was a delicious deep amber Vienna-style lager with a healthy maltly backbone and crisp German noble hops. It's still one of the better Canadian microbrews, but it's lost some character since the takeover.
You have to ask?
Hoping against hope, Rebecca. This is an emergency, after all.
An emergency is no excuse for self-delusion. Though, working here ...
Actually, I'm quite familiar with Creemore Springs. A friend has a ski chalet up there and we used to actually stop at the brewery on the way and pick up a case (or several). Both before and after the Molson acquisition it was never a BAD beer and far superior to the typical Canadian/Blue/Bud swill (and I still tend to order it at many pubs where it's the closest available to craft beers), but I think there are many craft beers which are far, far superior. Of course, I tend to gravitate towards India Pale Ales (true ones, not weak imitations like Alexander Keith's) that are incredibly hoppy, so Creemore doesn't really fit my tastes.
Man, I'd be curious to try the stuff you make. I've got a home-brewing kit but it's not the greatest quality and my results at home haven't been great. I have, however, gone to a "brew your own beer" place where you can use the professional grade equipment and I've made some really nice stuff that I think beats most Canadian IPAs but still doesn't come close to the American stuff...which because of the stupid LCBO monopoly in Ontario, I can't get here.
Yes, the United States is pretty much the standard for microbreweries, particular with that American-style hop-bomb IPA. I admit I'm in a bit of a paradise situation out here in the Pacific Northwest: Oregon and N. Calilfornia have some of the best beers in the world. BC is a ways behind Ontario & Quebec, let alone the US, which is partly why I got into brewing!
As for homebrewing, I have some fairly sophisticated equipment at home, but of course the key to good beer is the ingredients: homebrewing has progressed so far from the kit-style extract packs where now I make it from high-quality grains, whole hop flowers and specialty yeast strains. Making beer is surprisingly easy -- the hard part is consistency. But that's not as important to homebrewers -- in fact, it's part of the attraction!
Yes, I've looked at some high quality home brew kits but they tend to be very expensive as well as massive. I've got a cheap kit and it's just not cutting it.
The good BC brewery I can think of Tree Brewing Co. in Kelowna which makes an American-style double IPA called "Hop Head", which is quite good. Granville Island was a local brewery that also recently gote purchased by Molson.
I live in Toronto where there are a fair number of decent craft breweries (as well as many in the surrounding areas) and a few good pubs withnice selections of good craft beers. We're moving in the right direction but still way behind the States.
Hey Catchfire, you're in BC, right? I just tried a great craft beer from Surrey: Red Racer IPA. Really nice beer, maybe the best Canadian IPA I've had and holds up quite respectably to many of the great California IPAs I've had.
That's a decent brew, Mr. Tea. Best of all it comes in a can! I'm usually generally impressed with Howe Sound in Squamish too. They serve almost exclusively in 1L swing-top bottles, save a new pilsner which comes in a can too. A favourite for our weekly softball match.
I'm currently visiting Ontario, however -- and before a landed a nasty stomach bug, I was getting my fill of Mill St. Tasty beverage, that.
As an aside, I suppose it should come to no surprise that a thread about jerky became a thread about beer.
Well, nothing goes with jerky better than beer.
I'm pretty impressed with this Red Racer. I found it at the LCBO and figured I'd try it. I put one can in the freezer while I mowed the lawn. Came in hot and sweaty and downed an ice cold Red Racer IPA, which really hit the spot.
Anyway, hope you feel better. If you do, and want to try some good beers in Toronto, I'd recommend you visit Bar Volo, C'est What, Victory Cafe or Granite Brew Pub.
Haha, this thread is awesome.
bump
Just noticed this. I don't know if the most challenging example is a food joint, but rather a certain brand of underwear which is VERY comfortable, and to make it worse, isn't made out of cotton or hydrocarbons.
(darn those capitalists who know how to push the socially conscious buttons)
Is it less bad if it wasn't invested in by Dr. Evil?
Or if I got them as a present?
I don't think very comfortable underwear fits into my definition of "bad". How could it?
In my case, I would buy 30 pair because clearly as soon as I think it's something I will go back to the store for, they will discontinue it.
What is it made of?
At least (most) men don't have to deal with the tragedy of discontinued bras.
bamboo fibre. Really nice.
Though no worries in the bra department. My partner's work involves a lot of breast health, so she deals with a a few custom fitting places, and this one brand that is advertised as one-size fits all (though really, they have a couple of different sizes).